Overwhelmed

I'm only one person, just little old me,
I can't be in two places, though I wish I could be.
At first I had one job, it was easy to do,
But then came a second job, nothing terribly new.
And then a small wrinkle was thrown in the works,
As a third job was added by my bosses, those jerks.
Now, I'm trying my darndest to get it all done,
But I'm getting bogged down and I've lost all my fun.
But my bosses, it's true, are not wholly to blame,
I hate asking for help and I like holding the reins.
But I'm learning to accept help when it comes,
So today's a bit calmer than the three prior ones.
Hopefully soon my job count will be two,
And with a great sigh of relief I will say "phew!"


As you may have keyed in on from the poem above, work has been hectic of late. Somehow, over the past two weeks, I've found myself essentially working three jobs. Or trying to, anyway. It's not been easy and it's turned me into, what can kindly be called, a cranky pants. Luckily the person who was out for two weeks (which added the third job to my already crowded plate) is back and I will be down to two jobs on Monday. Thank goodness! The pace I was keeping was entirely unsustainable. Now to just find my next position so that I'm not stuck doing two jobs, one of which is a clerkship, forever...

The Worst Effing Day

What I now say won't sound fun and happy,
I just don't have that in me, this day is too crappy.
Last night was just awful, a night truly dour,
It made my mood both salty and sour.
But I thought for sure that today would be better,
A night of good sleep and I'd be unfettered.
But I woke up this morning feeling quite blue,
As if the world had instead said, "Lauren, f*** you."
Being a good sport, I was still willing to smile,
And hope it would improve in a small while.
But that didn't happen. Oh no, not at all,
Instead even worse was soon to befall.
Just hit after hit keeps coming my way,
Leading me to believe that this is the worst effing day.


In order of appearance...

1. A special showing of my favorite movie Labyrinth was occuring at OMSI (Oregon Museum of Science and Industry) with a special 30 minute lecture beforehand by Toby Froud who played baby Toby in the movie, is a puppeteer himself and is the son of Brian Froud who designed all the creatures for Labyrinth and The Dark Crystal for Jim Hensen. Basically, the man is the son of genius. I even have a signed print by Brian Froud hanging up in my house. So I really wanted to go to this. I've been to most of the other movies in the Reel Science series OMSI puts on (Jaws, Jurassic Park, The Princess Bride, etc.) and while many were full, none sold out. Well, this was the one that sold out and I was turned away at the counter despite arriving very early. Hit one.
2. I arrived home after being turned away to find a letter from the Portland City Attorney's office addressed to "Laura Moser" (ummmm...hello? My name is Lauren) regretfully informing me that they have hired someone else for the job that I really, really wanted. Total bummer. Hit two.
3. That day I was supposed to have traveled down to SoCal to spend time with my family during my big sister's fourth chemo treatment and for my mother's birthday, but work kept me in Portland. Hit three.
4. The next morning I woke up and went to work. Hit four. (Work is always counted as a hit.)
5. My favorite author, Terry Pratchett, died today. He was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease several years ago and kept writing despite his illness, even releasing a book just last year. He died from natural causes associated with the disease. I first discovered Terry Pratchett sometime in college on a whim. My friend Mallory and I watched a movie that had this amazing preview for a strange looking film called Hogfather. We both thought it looked incredible and tried to find it at our local movie rental store (Elephant Pharmacy - this was Berkeley, CA after all) to no avail. Well, a year or so later I was randomly perusing the science fiction aisle at Borders (another fallen hero) when I came across a title that was instantly familiar to me...Hogfather by Terry Pratchett. Why, it was a book first! I thought to myself. I immediately bought the book and and was hooked from that point on. I now own almost every Discworld novel in hardback and have read them multiple times. His books are funny, satirical, biting, insightful, and thought provoking. I cannot believe that he is gone and will never write again. It's amazing how attached we grow to people that we have tangible connection to. I obviously never met Terry Pratchett, but I always felt like I knew him. He was a friend who transported me to this amazing realm and introduced me to some of my most beloved characters. When I need something to just pass the time, to give me a laugh, or improve my mood, I reach for anything written by Terry Pratchett. And now that he's gone it feels as though I've lost a close friend. Hit five.
6. I wasn't with my sister during her fourth chemo treatment. Hit six.
7. One of my best friends at my current job is leaving for her next position at a downtown Portland civil litigation firm. She is ready and eager for this new job and I know she will be absolutely amazing. And she's still going to be close enough for us to meet up for lunch and fun after work. But it won't be the same. We won't be able to instant message each other during the day any more and I won't be able to run up the two flights of stairs to her Courtroom to just hang out when we both have free time. I'm really happy for her and so excited at this opportunity, but I'm also sad. Hit seven.

I'm now trying to come to terms with all of this. I allowed myself today to wallow, be a general grump, and embrace a woe-is-me attitude. Tomorrow though I will buck up and get over it. On to bigger and better things. Look out, world! 'Cause I will not let this stand. 

Farewell, Jon Stewart

I've thought long and hard about a possible poem for today, but in the end just couldn't bring myself to write one. The reason is...I am too sad. Why am I sad, you ask? Because Jon Stewart is leaving The Daily Show. This is devastating news. I have been an ardent fan of both The Daily Show and The Colbert Report for years. In fact, of all my TV watching (and I do more than is probably good for me), those are/were the two shows I most consistently watched. And it wasn't long after my introduction that I used them as my most trusted and comprehensive source of world news. On The Daily Show Jon Stewart skewers politicians and pundits with insightful and ridiculously witty comments and digs. On The Colbert Report my beloved Stephen would then make me laugh out loud with his ridiculously pompous conservative persona. It was tragic when Colbert left and The Colbert Report ended. I still have the final episode saved on my DVR in case I need one more run through. A kind of truthiness security blanket. But I consoled myself with the knowledge that I still had Jon. At least I wasn't completely abandoned. And Larry Wilmore was soon to begin a new show in Colbert's old spot, The Nightly Show. I eagerly awaited the start of this new show as I had always considered Larry Wilmore to be one of The Daily Show correspondents who could most easily hold up his own half hour program. After less than a month I can now say that I love Wilmore's new show. The round table discussions with people who hold varying perspectives on issues are fascinating and Wilmore does an amazing job of both keeping his guests on topic and keeping the discussions largely civil (no small feat when you're discussing obesity in America, Bill Cosby, and how we view war, just to name a few). I am quickly becoming a huge fan of The Nightly Show.

But I am not ready to lose Stewart. I was worried when I heard that Stewart and Comedy Central were still in "contract negotiations." And I was even more concerned when I went to see Rosewater, which Jon Stewart directed, and realized it was really good and he could make a viable career turn toward director. But I held out hope even as I expected the worst - that Stewart would leave us all to the whims of traditional nightly news pundits. Two nights ago Stewart brought down the hammer and announced that he was leaving The Daily Show. As I said before, it was devastating. Made even more so because I was given this news by my mother who called me at 9:00 pm to ask how I was doing and upon hearing I was ok, but a little blue, she said "Well, to make matters worse have you seen the news yet that Jon Stewart is leaving?" No, Mom, but thanks for making my night just that much worse.

I understand that Jon Stewart can't continue at his job forever. He has to move on to bigger and better things. And to be honest, I think it's been obvious for a couple of years now that he has been more frustrated and less able to see the humor in what he reports than in years past. As a viewer and average citizen I am tired of how ridiculous and ineffective our news media and politicians have become and it seems that every year they get worse no matter how much we plead for change and bipartisanship. I can only imagine how much harder it grinds on you when you do a job like Stewart's, being the actual voice for his viewers to those people with seemingly little to show for it in changes to the system. Jon Stewart deserves a break. But I wish he didn't! I wish that he could continue as the anchor and leader of The Daily Show forever. Unfortunately, it's not to be. He won't be leaving right away and we have him for at least a few more months, but now as I watch his show each evening (Monday through Thursday) it will be with a heart heavy with the knowledge that each episode brings us closer to the end. Now that Stewart has announced his plans to leave news outlets are awash with articles speculating on who could fill his desk. John Oliver did a phenomenal job of it when Stewart left to direct Rosewater and many of his other correspondents could pick up the mantle with aplomb (Jessica Williams would be fantastic). But the truth of the matter is that no matter who next sits at The Daily Show desk, they will never be Jon Stewart. I am positive that the new person will do a great job and I know that I will continue watching, but Jon Stewart is one of a kind. Whip smart, incredibly well read, and outrageously well-informed on seemingly every political and world-affecting topic, I just can't see how anyone can do exactly what he does. And maybe that's ok. When someone new sits at that desk, they should make it their own. Put their own spin and flair on it. But I will still miss The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. And I'll be savoring these last few months.

Changes

Changes, changes all around,
Up above and on the ground.
Sometimes I look around and see,
Everything is different, even me.
But then I think that I'm the same,
And it seems to be some strange game,
That others play and leave me out,
A game of chess where they move about.
But I'm still standing completely still,
And I don't understand how I will
Ever figure out this shifting world,
That seems so strange as it unfurls.
Does everyone fell like a leaf at times,
Battered and blown without reason or rhyme?
I wish that I could just yell "freeze!"
And take a moment just to breathe.
To feel like I can catch up a bit,
A moment to myself where I can just sit
And be me in this time and space,
Not constantly reacting with a brave face.
But the world and time offer no such breaks,
The clock ticks on and so I'll take
One deep breath and then one more,
Until I can accept feeling unmoored.
Tomorrow will be better, there's hope for today,
I'll just keep breathing until I find my way.

On the Subject of Reading

Now, instead of a poem this week you get a diatribe instead....I hope you enjoy.

Why don't people read anymore? I know this is a bit of an over-broad statement, but I think it holds true for a lot of people. People simply don't read much anymore. Why is this? I love reading. I own thousands of books. Quite literally. Books are stashed all over my house (bookshelf, closet, other closet, other bookshelf, under my bed - all the usual places for a true bookworm) and my books even cover the bookshelves in my parents' home (my Dad's books have all been pushed out to one lonely little bookshelf in the loft). But I find more and more that I am one of very few people who read more than 5 books a year. In fact, that's a statistic I recently read in a magazine article - the average American reads only 5 books per year. How is that even possible?? Reading is such a key aspect of life and everyone should embrace it. Reading can improve your life in so many ways. Reading can give you an escape from your daily life. It can teach you something new. Reading can offer you a new perspective that you've never considered before. And reading improves your mind - I always notice a difference in my vocabulary and even the way I think based on what I've been reading. So I can't understand people who say "I don't like to read." What does that even mean?? How do you get through life? Do you just watch TV and assume everything some pundit tells you is the entire story on the matter? You won't read an in-depth look at the history of North Korea that led to the current state of government? Ok, maybe that's not the best example (although it sounds like an interesting topic to me). But, really, how do you not like to read? Maybe the real problem here is that you haven't found your particular book genre yet. That's a travesty. But you shouldn't give up! Keep trying new books. Find a friend with similar interests and attitudes and ask them for a book recommendation. I am always willing to give you a helping hand to find a new book you would love. I can't imagine a life without books and the written word. It would be too dull to even contemplate. I hope all of you are big readers (the fact that you've stuck with this monstrosity of an email suggest you are). If you're not and you're one of those people who "don't like to read," please give books another chance. I promise you'll find something that will change your mind.

Martin Luther King Jr. Day

Monday is Martin Luther King Jr. Day, more commonly known as MLK Day. I must admit that I fall into the category of most Americans who often think of a holiday as merely a fun day off work. The actual meaning of the day is lost somewhere in the excitement of a three-day weekend  or an unexpected break in the middle of a work week. The big holidays are easy to remember and celebrate because we, as a people, have created some sort of spectacle that goes along with them. Fireworks on the 4th of July (Independence Day), carols and trees at Christmas, shopping turkey at Thanksgiving. I hear the reminders to thank our veterans on Veteran's Day and to think of laborers on Labor's Day...actually, I have no idea what we're really celebrating on Labor's Day (although wikipedia tells me I'm right), which just goes to show my point...but I rarely stop to truly consider what the holiday means and I usually just pass by those reminders with a nod and a thought of "oh yeah, I should do that." Some holidays are universally acknowledged, but not universally understood or truly celebrated. Their meaning is lost because we don't attach some sort of visual or event to that day. It's just an extra day off work and that seems to be enough. But should it be? Shouldn't we take the time to remember why we celebrate these days? What was so important and meaningful to our country that our nation decided to declare this day a national holiday, a day everyone would be free to celebrate? Well, Monday is Martin Luther King Jr. Day, a day to celebrate an amazing man in American history. A man who fought for equality and rights for all. I think that is something worth remembering. Monday is more than just the third day in a long weekend. Monday is a day to remember a man who helped lead a movement that brought truth to the words stated in our Declaration of Independence, that all men are created equal.

A holiday is coming up, it's time to celebrate.
Some time off work, put up your feet, but there's more, just wait.
Think about what this day really means to us,
Freedom, civil liberties, and a world a tad more just.
We must reflect on our lives today and how we can improve,
To get closer to The Dream, it just may behoove
Us all to work on the way we treat the people around,
Regardless of race, religion or creed, or where they can be found.
So let us celebrate Dr. King in the proper way,
And reduce our prejudice a little more each day.

Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day, everyone. 

My first lunch poem of the new year

Welcome to the New Year

The new year is upon us now,
But slow it down, don't have a cow.
I know you're thinking that it's time,
For diet, exercise and saving a dime.
But I ask you now, and think it through,
How about a taco salad with a few
Of your closest friends, buddies from work,
Some of the greatest judicial clerks.
Take a cheat day, we won't tell,
Sit down with us and chat a spell.
For lunch is just so much more fun,
When we're all together and out of the sun.
Hidden away in the Standard cave,
Rehashing old topics from past Thursdays.
Nothing new to discuss or new people to meet,
Just the same old faces and old taco meat.
Wait a second here, what am I saying??
We've gotten off topic, the convo is straying.

Ha. Ha ha. *Ahem*

To embrace the new year of 2015,
Join us for lunch, the usual routine.
Come early, on time, even a bit late,
I hope you all make it, it's sure to be great.